Thursday, April 30, 2009

Letter to a Friend

Oh, I've not updated for sometime now! Thanks to a good friend/sister, MissHighFlyer that reminded me to update. I can't ignore the strong messages from Lati Ayoola, Aloofar and Princekay123. I love you all. That's why I can't forget to pray for you guys every morning. Well, am fully back to blogville, I mean it. I must say I really miss the jokes from Agbero (that guy is a big clown!)

I don't really have much to talk about. What do I need to say? I've liberated myself from the shackles of an enemy-friend and I am now enjoying every bit of my life. I just realised it is good to be single; it's good to be free.

I stumbleed on this letter written to a friend by Segun Awoniyi (my senior in school) and felt like sharing it. Enjoy it! This is a pre-post; I'll properly update soon. Cheers!

Dear Olu,

Trust you will understand if I delay the compliments…

What is BBC, CNN, Times etc saying about the election in Ekiti? I guess you will soon post the “unbelievable” stories…

They are true! They may be exaggerated but how true can they be….a little margin of error from being absolutely true.

I renounced my childhood dreams I held like a conviction this past week because I wont like to live a miserable adult life because this is not where you say “YES WE CAN!” before you ask yourself without delusion that “Even if I can, what about the system”I see myself giving sixteen years old Olusegun Awoniyi at FESTAC College of those days a knock for daring to dream of being President when his AUDACITY is not hinged on substance before even considering hope….the fact that it won’t materialize is not based on pessimism but glaring realities.

The first is that we hate truth; truth actually is what suits us, what is in our favour. If it is not in our favour, it becomes an error; it should be turned on its head by propaganda. I still wonder (maybe beyond next tomorrow) when we will be able to conduct elections where losers will see themselves as such and get on with their life which in truth is actually much more important than dictating the life of others ironically in what we call a democracy.

Playwrights need no inspiration out here as the drama is always interesting to behold with poor folks fighting to defend two or more evils they are willing pawns to choose from-some regrettably lose their life in the process. To join the fray because of patriotic ambition can only result in three basic choices….I kill my conscience; my conscience kills me even if I don’t die physically, or I be killed by those who can’t stand my having a conscience! Those who fail will also be on the sidelines shouting and cursing before they soon realize they are alone with the still small voice saying “if you can’t beat them….”

I know you are busy working up your sleeves, continue in that and be not vain like our two billionaires who continually accuse each other on pages of newspapers of manipulating the stock market to deceive the public and flex false muscles of their financial strength….for now, you won’t be envious of anyone who says that can only happen in our country.

Do have a nice week ahead of you and smile in-spite of the so many absurdities whether in Halliburton or elsewhere; after all we are the happiest people in the world…we go survive!
Your namesake!

NB: culled from SEGUN AWONIYI's NOTE

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

I'm Lonely

It’s over 2 full months since I disappeared from blogsphere. I had to do that for my own interest. I needed to concentrate on certain areas that will make or mar my future; I needed a break.

Thanks to the greatest motivators. I mean people who never got bored of saying hi and hello to know how truly I was feeling and also suggested ways to tackle my personal problems. Princekay123, Aloofar, Latifa, Sollomonsydelle, Mike, Kay9, Iwalewa, Wienna, Doll, Teeee, Snapes, LG, Geebee, Oyin, Princesa, Smaragd, Standtall-The Activist, Aloted, Oluwadee, Bumight, and my blogsphere uncle – Sola Folowosele. I also acknowledge the contributions of other bloggers (too numerous to mention) who gave me encouragement.

I believe everything in life happens as a way to teach us lessons. Everything at all is a stage out of the different phases in our lives.

After the whole argument and counter argument went down, I approached him to get everything sorted out. I was at his place on February 10, 11 and 12 but he couldn’t provide the money he promised. He was just giving flimsy excuses and telling cock and bull story. I was really mad at him but kept my cool.
On Val’s day, I went back to his place but was shocked to find another girl inside the apartment. Though I wasn’t feeling jealous, I was not comfortable. The lady did not even allow me in. I stood at the entrance of the flat for twenty-five minutes that it took him to show up. When he came and I complained, he took it up and descended on me. He gave me the beating of my life. I was never beaten like that in my life. With a swollen face, I approached my mum but what she said baffled me. She told me she had warned me severally to be careful of the doctor. The same thing my sisters said.
I wept like a baby that day. I knew it was the death of my dad that caused everything. I reported the matter at the police station but they couldn’t do anything. They only told him to pay for my treatment or treat me free of charge. He was also asked to make an agreement to return my money. It is over one month now, he hasn’t paid a dime. The lackadaisical attitude of my mum and sisters was what he exploited. He knew I’m a weak person and he deliberately inflicted that injury on me. What a double loss!

It was during the payment time in the office that I discovered that I only went to the office 6 working days in February. I was paid only 10% of my salary and also had a Suspension Letter waiting for me. I had caused a great loss to the company for those periods I didn’t go to work. I had shunned meetings, lost contacts with clients, delayed certain goods from being sold and some from being cleared. I never knew my loss of concentration had caused a great havoc to the firm. I also learnt that my PA/Secretary had been sacked because her service was no longer needed since I am on suspension. I was angry because nobody gave me a hint, not even my friends in the office. I was all alone with 3 months suspension.

On March 9, I started my exam in school. It was a dismal outing. I was not psychologically ready to write 11 papers in 7 days. These papers include 4 carry-overs. My God! I dubbed all through. I 'giraffed'; I 'photocopied' others. My intention was just to pass and get out.

My exams are over and it seems my position is no longer guaranteed in the office. The house is too hot for me to stay because I can’t cope with criticisms from everybody again. My friends, neighbours, relations and even church-friends torment my life with blames. I’m presently hanging out here in Ibadan in my Granny’s dilapidated bungalow in the outskirt of Bodija. She's the only one reasoning in from my viewpoint. She's the only one I talk to. I am damn too lonely. I can’t wait to put everything behind me and start life again. I am damn sure I won’t TRUST anybody again!

Thursday, January 22, 2009


I am doing myself a favour by writing this. Though the thought of this write up brings me close to tears, I know I had to do it to ease the burden and to liberate myself from the bondage that I placed on myself.

You will understand why I am lamenting after reading this post.

If you have been following this blog, you will recall that just after my break up with Gbenga, ‘Wale’ (a medical doctor by profession) came miraculously into my life. I found him to be a caring, intelligent, kind-hearted and cool-headed guy. He has this pedigree that will make you adore him at first contact. He is handsome, gentle and bulky. He has a sense of humour and knows how to tickle me. Meeting him was something I usually look forward to everyday. Many times I missed meetings with my boss and snub official duties to keep appointment with him. I would lie to my mum that I had so many works to do in the office, but spend the whole time with Wale in his cosy apartment. I thought all was well, but I got the biggest shock of my life. Wale jilted me ‘professionally’.

Even though my heart is still bleeding, I have no choice but to continue my life. I know I will be more observant next time. Here is the full gist.


Our first date was on a Saturday. We were at Mega Plaza to have drinks and to unwind. I was just coming back from a client’s office where I’d gone to collect an outstanding balance. The client who is a very close family friend pleaded that I should help him deliver the money to the accountant because he could not find his way to the bank that day. Since the money was meant for the company and I was on my way back to the office, I accepted to help him out. Instead of going back to the office, I went to Obalende to hook up with ‘Wale’ who had been calling me to ascertain if our first day would be possible.

We later went back to Mega Plaza, our original venue. We got there around 6pm and started chatting. I noticed that he didn’t come with his car, so I asked him what happened to it. He explained that he had a minor accident the previous day but just didn’t want me to panic about it, which was why he did not inform me. He told me he lost over 300,000 to the accident and that he needed about 70,000 to balance the mechanics handling the repair of the car. The way he said those words touched me badly and I had no choice but to help him. Out of the 100,000 I was taking back to the office, I gave him 70,000 to settle the car issue. At first, he refused to collect it, but when I persisted he took it and thanked me. He really appreciated it and I was glad I helped him. I also paid for our entire entertainment that day. That was just one of the numerous assistance I did for him. I even took him to our company’s lawyer who helped him get UK visa for his younger sister with 100,000 as my own commitment. He also promised to help me purchase a half plot of land in Lekki so that I can have that as investment. Being a good idea, I trusted him and paid half of the money into his account. Though my elder sister who got to know when I was withdrawing the money objected, I was determined to TRUST him. I was ‘lost’ by his sweet projections and intelligence.

The romance blossomed by the day. I could not sleep without knowing he was alright and he also showed great concern about me. He would insist that I come for weekly check ups at his office. Most times, I go there on Saturdays when I don’t have much to do in the house. We would gist, play, kiss and romance. It was a great experience.

The bubble busted after during the New Year break. I noticed that ‘Wale’ was nowhere to be found on Xmas day. “Where on earth were you on Christmas day,” I queried him the next day.
“I had to attend to a very important patient privately, so I had to switch off my phones,” He said.
I insisted that he could have called me instead of being incommunicado through out that important day, but he apologized. So, I forgave him. But the same thing happened on the New Year day. I couldn’t reach him all through. When I confronted him again, he complained about network problem. Though I refused to probe further, I knew inside me that something was happening. Meanwhile, a friend told me that she spotted ‘Wale’ and his so-called sister at a bar together.
“Their relationship is more that that. They are dating,” she told me but I refused to listen. I knew my man cannot lie or deceive me.

On January 4, a Sunday, I went to his house at a time I knew he would not have been around. Of course I didn’t go there to see him; I went there to interrogate his neighbour. He had at one time introduced me to the guy during one of my numerous visits, so I had no problem checking on the guy. Besides, the guy is a fresh graduate of my school, so it was very easy getting him to ‘talk’. Immediately I entered the guy’s flat, I told him my mission. As a way to forcing words out of his mouth, I told the guy I know ‘Wale’ is dating the girl that lives in his apartment but I just wanted details. When the guy heard that, he confessed. He narrated everything: How ‘Wale’ and the lady traveled for Introduction on Xmas day, how he told him that he is only planning to ‘use and dump’ me, how he intends to get more cash from me and travel abroad...

“He had gotten a UK visa for himself and the lady. They are getting married very soon,” the guy said.

When I heard up to this level, I fainted.

I woke up only to find the guy ‘fanning’ me. He had poured water on my head and I could see the surprise mood on his face when I regained consciousness. Without uttering any word, I left the place dejectedly. It was as if the whole world is crashing. I’ve just been jilted and duped by somebody I am ready to die for. I was running mad.

Later that night, the kind neighbour called me to know how I was feeling and also announced that ‘Wale’ has packed out of the place that night. “He came back when you were unconscious and discovered that you’ve known his secrets. He is out of town,” the guy announced as if that was a good news. Since then, I don’t know his whereabout and his phones are always switched off.

Even if I bump into him by chance, what will I ask from him: my heart or money? I am totally confused now.

My weakness is that I always believe whatever people say. My mum always cautions me to be critical when accepting what people say, but I just don’t care. This is the result of my carelessness. I just don’t know what to do. Who do I report to? For over three weeks I couldn’t open up to people, even my mum. That was why I was away from blogville. I didn’t know what to do – whether to tell people or pretend as if nothing happened. But come to think of it: How do I tell them of my third experience? Am I the only innocent girl in this world? What have I done wrong?

For the main time, I’ve found solace in Agbero’s blog to laugh away my sorrow. I know God will make me smile again!